Tea is of the Essence

Tea is of the Essence
 

Ok... so... To start, I don't think Will is an opportunist. I just think he's kinda lame. And I think Will and Cynthia’s kisses are really awkward because they don't seem to have any chemistry. Which sucks, because Cynthia has HELLA chemistry with Peter... I also don't think she hired Will (a la Kenya and Walter). She's dating and we all know how hard it is for a HOE to date out here... In any case, Cynthia deserves to be happy and in the relationship she wants. By the end of the episode, we find that this one ain't it...

But let's back up... NEW HOE FRIEND ALERT! Or is it an old friend? Whatever. Eva Marcille of America's Next Top Model fame is here to fuck shit up.

Alright... Everybody's going to Kandi's Essence cover party. (You better work, Kandi!) Nene's bringing Eva and let's her know that Cynthia's bringing Will. Turns out... Eva met Will and his girlfriend when the couple attended a fundraiser for her won't-be mayor bae. This is drama I can get into.

Instead of telling Cynthia as soon as she sees her (or even texting her from the car as soon as Eva tells her), Nene and Eva tell all the other girls what's up. So now Cynthia is bringing a steak into the lion's den and everybody's looking at her. Plus her ex husband is in the building (and matching with Marlo?)

Kenya's like, "Alright... Great info. I'm telling Cynthia," because she doesn't want Cynthia to be ambushed and told in a group. I feel like old Petty Kenya would have done this same thing, but since she's new Grown Kenya it’s not mean spirited.

However, that's not how this show works. And as Kenya moves to pull Cynthia aside, the rest of the ladies follow. In the one on one, Nene's talking about she could've told Cynthia; she didn't need Kenya to do it. Well, why didn't you, bitch?! Anyway... the reveal isn't an ambush, but it's definitely a scene. Cynthia receives the information well, but eventually Will joins the mix, and it all goes downhill from here.

Instead of being straightforward with Cynthia -- since she did ask him straight up 30 minutes ago before she knew any of this mess -- Will calls Eva over for faux transparency and starts arguing with her. Now this is a real scene because the other women want to know why this man is bitching at Eva.

Cynthia has been really open with Will and all he had to do was be open in return, but now... Porsha's got some info, too, and we get our first real, possibly-worth-it "To Be Continued..." of the season. Let's hope her info is better than her "Marvin" story...

TL;DW

Kandi flies above all the haters. Nene has a new friend. Cynthia is dating The Talented Mr. Ripley. Kenya is the new bone collector. Sheree is missing the real party. Porsha is telling, since you asked...

BONUS

The Talented Mr. Jones?

Let's be honest... Porsha and Kim "connected" because nobody wants to film with either one of them.

Also... again... Porsha's a good person despite her inability to be a good friend. Don Juan and Carmon are bitches.